I’m a teacher. I fix plumbing problems.

UPDATE: Sorry, the username and password below don’t work any longer. Sorry
According to a career test, my interests and abilities qualify me for the following ten jobs (I didn’t realize were so closely related).
1.Pipefitter
2.Ironworker
3.Physical Education Teacher
4.Elementary School Teacher
5.Special Education Teacher
6.Steamfitter
7.High School Teacher
8.Sprinkler System Installer
9.Construction Tradesperson
10.Bricklayer / Stonemason
This is very comforting, seeing as how [...]

More futuristic stuff

In thinking about the future I forgot to mention that the summer session will begin in about a month-and-a-half. We’ve already ammassed a team of teachers and students who’ll attend this summer program, which will funciton more like an educational camp than regular school, and we’re working to create curriculum for this program.
The coolest [...]

My favorite statement of the year

This is exactly why I love teaching 8th grade — you never know what kids will say. They say inappropriate things, they say caustic things, they say funny things, and they say sad things. They talk all the time and I try to share what I can when I get the chance, but [...]

My whole nose smells like spoiled milk

Every year we take our entire team of students on an end-of-the-year field trip, and the money that funds that trip usually comes from our selling some snacks during a daily “nutrition break.” Our income was thwarted this year when the district decided teachers could not sell any unapproved items to the students — [...]

Calvin and Hobbes — the world’s greatest teachers

Surfing through Digg today led me to a Calvin and Hobbes cartoon.
A little digging through the comments led me to a searchable database of C&H comics.
Search for anything and you’ll find it. “School” brings up some bona-fide gems. If you’re looking for (one of my favorite Calvin incarnations) “Spaceman Spiff,” [...]

5 simple things

Welll, it’s been a long time coming…finally done with the Christmas break, finally done with family (no offense) in the house, and finally (geesh, did I just say that?) back in the classroom.
In the past week or so, a meme has been going around: the 5-Things-About-Me Meme, and I’ve been tagged by a number of [...]

A word from our sponsors…

“I think I need to go home.”
Why’s that?
“Becaaaauuuse.”
Oh. Gotcha. Are you feeling all right?
“No. I peed blood.”
Yeah. You need to see the nurse.
This episode of A-Kid-Who’s-Been-Kicked-In-The Nuts™ was brought to you by Ball Balm.
Ball Balm — the people who made the nurse write, on the form handed to you by the [...]

Thanks!

About half the teachers at my school yesterday had the kids answer the question: “What are you thankful for?” It never occurred to me to use that question, and I’m thankful I didn’t — you can’t iimagine how many students were walking down the hallways complaining about how they’d done it over and over [...]

Potty humor

We all need to use the bathroom, right? If you’re anything like me, you use the bathroom when you can (pun not intended), not when you need it. Sometimes I go hours without using it, and sometimes my schedule makes me wait an entire day.
Today, though, I had to go. REALLY had [...]

I found a note!

Found another note today, and this one’s a doozy!
Hello. How are you today.
Well Guess what my firend told me yesterday
that when I ask you out that I was gross. because she thinks your ugly.
How heartbreaking! How awful!
This note starts off with such a warm and welcoming welcome that I, as a reader, [...]